connect!

peep show.

I swear I hear a little cry when I bite their marshmallow heads off.
Sorry little peeps.

Every February, no matter what corner of the world I'm in, my mother always manages to send me a Valentine's Day package. They vary from year to year depending on where I am and what she is able to send. She usually sends candies, chocolates, heart decorations, a mug with hearts on it, and if I'm lucky, she'll manage to get in a box of my favorite Entenmann's Valentine's Day cupcakes that I swear have a day's worth of calories in one serving. I have saved her trinkets from every year, my favorite being a pink mini snow globe that snows pink glitter and reads "I love your hugs".

Thanks to my mother, Valentine's Day to me was never just about being in a couple. I've spent more Valentine's Day as a single girl enjoying bubbly and sweets with pink glitter nail polish on. She pressed that it's a day to be a little kitschy, indulge in a few calories, gives the people you love an extra hug or two, and enjoy the fact that it is mid-February as we get over the hump of winter. 

This year's package came with candy conversation hearts (big and small), strawberry cream Peeps dipped in milk chocolate, heart garland and wreaths, rose-scented tea lights and a card wishing us a Happy Valentine's Day with an announcement that her and her pilot boyfriend are coming to Paris next week for an entire week. None of this 36-hour layover malarkey, they're coming on a real vacation and are staying at a hotel that is up the street from our apartment. That is the best Valentine's Day surprise!

Yesterday afternoon, Aurelien's friend Thomas came by to play "Call of Duty", an extremely violent video game where they play with other participants around the world. When these video game play dates befall, I usually hear the sound of ten-year-old boys from around the world cursing and threatening to Aurelien and Thomas in terrible English that they're going to get their heads blasted off.

Wanting them to take a break from the 14-year-old boy in Germany who if you ask me was taking the insults a little too far, I peeked my head into the bedroom to see if they wanted some candy. I had made a small plate of candy hearts and strawberry peeps and popped open a bottle of crèmant.

"Voulez-vous des bonbons américains, 
une "peep" ou autre chose?

Both of them who are hip to all of my gaffes asked me to repeat the sentence in English. Hmm okay. "Do you guys want American candy, a peep, or something else?" 

I thought the sentence was pretty clear and direct.

Maybe a bit too direct....

Well, Miss Coquine strikes again. Similar to my famous beet story, peep, which is not an available candy here in France, and when said, one expression and only one expression as peep (spelled pipe) means this. I don't think I'll ever stop learning in this country. Just when I thought I had ironed out all of these little kinks...think again.

I'll be keeping the Peeps away from my students this week. That's only asking for it, especially with some of the lurking dads...

36 comments:

  1. HAHAHAA!! That is awesome! That word I do know already (I do hang out with a lot of French pervs, so I learn the dirty stuff quick. ^^). I'm surprised you're just learning it now! I'm glad you didn't know it b/c this Peep story is great! Now I need to find a way to order some Peeps to show to my silly French friends who'd get such a kick out of it!

    Good thing you've learned this before bringing any 'bjs' into the classroom! You may have gotten fired haha.. Or, worse.. excited some of the dads..

    My man is away for work but I have two Valentine's day parties, Thursday at a nice bar/lounge and Friday at someone's apt. Yesterday, I bought a pink "I <3 moustache" shirt (there's the typical mustache image, not the word "moustache") which I will dress up with a more 'serious' black, lacey cardigan, skirt/etc on Valentine's day evening. I can't wait! You?

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    1. Omg, I can only imagine the looks on the parent's faces if I brought these in. The comments! Oh la la!!

      I'm sure I have heard this word but you know not everything sticks, and given the casualness of the situation, I was just speaking before thinking. I was so excited to have American goodies in the house and was eager to share! Hmmmm, that sounds like a double meaning too. I've gotta be careful what I say!

      Sounds like you have a lovely Valentine's Day planned with friends. Love it! I hope you and your mec can do something belated. :)

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  2. BRILLIANT.

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  3. Hilarous!.... I now know what NOT to say.

    You have given me an idea for Valentines day. Something that usually passes by noticed in my house.........now I have read that I can see the double entendre!! LOL!

    BTW. have sent you an email. Coming to Paris next week.

    Love Denise

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    1. I suspect that you won't have these weird American candies in your possession, so I think you're in the clear, but it's good to know...just in case you do!

      Ooooh what's your idea from Valentine's day? Do share...or do blog!

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  4. At least this mistake was only made in front of Seb and his friend instead of a whole table of French people?

    When I first arrived I kept telling people I had a chatte noire (black cat.... which is a naughty way to say black p*$$y). Oopsie. In class my teacher tried to correct me to say chat noir but I didn't understand because my cat was female, so why would she tell me to say it was male.

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    1. That's true, I'm glad it wasn't in front of a bunch of people I don't know. We all got a good laugh out of it.

      Hahahahaha yes! I made the chatte mistake too in French class in NY once too! I had given my new kitten (Charlotte) a bath and she scratched me really bad so my teacher asked what happened, and I told him that my little female cat was aggressive when wet. Yours is even more hilarious!!!!!! Too funny! It's weird calling my cat a boy in a language that heavily focuses on differentiating between male and female. Glad it's not only me who finds it odd.

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  5. Oh I dunno, it would have been a valentine's day surprise... ;o)

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  6. Thanks for the info!!! :-) Keep leading the way.

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    1. Thanks Mem! I'll keep you all posted on any other future blunders to keep sharing the knowledge. :)

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  7. Oh dear! Hope Thomas didn't get too excited there! That's so sweet of your mum though, and great news that she's visiting.
    There has been some vague talk with my friends about doing an anti-valentines day thing, since we're all dateless and desperate, I mean delicious... But nothing organised as yet!

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    1. No Anti-Valentines Day! Embrace it as a day to eat sweets, drink something bubbly and hang out with friends! How fun does that sound?

      No, I don't think Thomas got to excited, he was too busy Tweeted and Instagramming the event. Good thing I'm not on Instagram!

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  8. Heeheehee. Oh those crazy Americans offering sexual favors!

    Oh I am so excited for you about your Mom's real visit!! Perfect.

    And Kipling was our Valentine's Day gift to each other, methinks. :)

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    1. Aren't we a wile bunch? Strawberry flavored peeps. He he he. I've been amusing myself with this all weekend.

      Yes! I'm so excited that she'll be here for real! We have so much planned.

      That's a lovely Valentine's Day gift, I hope he has a speedy recovery, and keep him away from those stitches! I love that Ben has a little buddy now. :)

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  9. Great story :-)

    I like your mum's version of Valentine's day too.

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    1. Thanks!

      Aww, I'll let her know. She made it very special for me...and still does. It's a lovely tradition she created.

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  10. I learn more French from your blog than my copy of Dummies. You are hilarious!

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    1. I'm so glad to hear it! Thank you. I know most of my readers know all of this stuff but there are plenty who don't and I'm happy to share the knowledge with you!

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  11. Seeing how you've had a few French boyfriends, I would have thought that that would have been one of the first naughty expressions you would have learned in French;)

    I like your mom's thinking:) In Finland, Valentine's day is "Friends' Day," which is a lot more inclusive. I like the idea:)

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    1. I think it's a good thing that I didn't learn this word from them actually, as it is pretty vulgar. They were jerks but apparently not too bad since none of them demanded a "pipe". Hahaha, how awful! Can you imagine?

      Yeah, my mom was awesome about Valentine's Day. She doesn't believe in being bitter and single on V Day, and I guess she wanted to pass this down to me at a young age. She wanted it be fun! I'm eating a candy heart as we speak that reads "My Boo". Hahaha so silly.

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    2. One more thing, Duchesse, can you say "pipe moi"? Hahahaha. I'm getting a kick out of this!

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    3. Non. Taille-moi une pipe ou fais-moi une pipe;)

      C'est vulgaire, mais pas tant que ça. C'est coquin et rigolo en même temps. "Suce-moi grosse salope!", ça c'est vulgaire.

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    4. Merci Duchesse! "Make me a pipe!" He he he...

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  12. It's a funny story, but I'm sure this is one of those vocabulary words you must have known long ago!

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    1. Perhaps I may have heard it in passing, but you also have to consider the scenario. I never have Peeps in my house, I wouldn't know how to describe them in English let alone French, so I just said the name not thinking. I didn't connect the two. Good thing the setting was casual enough that we got a good chuckle out of it. They both tweeted my question, so all in all, it was a good memory for everyone.

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  13. hahah! another one for the books and a lesson for me too! thank goodness for you ella, i'm always learning a few things that my french teacher clearly wouldnt teach me! And like Emily said, at least it was with Seb and his friend (and that 14 yr old german boy!) instead of a table of family!

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    1. I'm so glad that some of you learn French slang through my many hiccups!! It makes it all worth it. :) Who would have thought...and seriously when does anyone have a box of Peeps in their house?

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  14. Your mother rocks! It reminded me of the 'care packages' I would send my daughter when she was in college in NYC.

    Hahaha about the 'peeps' I was reading it as they were talking about the Pope's resignation on the radio...nice timing no?

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    1. My mom's care packages are awesome! She always stuff random goodies that she finds at Rite Aid. Those are always the best! It appears that moms love sending them as much as we love receiving them! : )

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  15. Well, I see you've gotten over your previous allergy, so that's good, I suppose;)

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    1. Every wedding caterer we've met with introduces us to a beetraves dish. I can't help but chuckle. What can I say, I'm immature. :)

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  16. Oh man! Too funny! Luckily, it was only Seb and one of his friends. That could be a very awkward dinner conversation (although your future in-laws do seem a lot cooler than your last ones;))

    While I do not live in a different country I did move to Pittsburgh from Memphis, TN when I was in the 7th grade. And let me tell you I got all kinda hell for how I said things. I remember asking a kid if he had "a pin [how I pronounced it at the time and sometimes still do] I could borrow." He looked at me strange and wasn't able to answer until I said "peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen." I was even asked by a close and very smart close girlfriend of mine if we had the same commercials down south. HA.

    Not really the same but I can def appreciate how you feel:)

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    1. Exactly! I was with close company, his best friend of 15 years, so I was safe, but the two of them got a good chuckle out of it for the rest of the afternoon as I kept hearing their comments while playing video games.

      I think any fish out of water story is comparable. You don't need to move to France to feel cultural differences! Well I hope that kid didn't make you feel too bad. I think pronouncing it "pin" is charming!

      Happy Valentine's Day to you!

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  17. At least you got their attention!
    P.S. So happy for you that your mom is coming over for a week!!! Have fun!

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