Day 186: See The Girl Who Robbed You.

Illustration by Garance Doré

Since August, there hasn't been a week that has gone by without a sublet robbery story. I swear, I'll be 90 years old and still be dealing with her as she gives me back the things that she stole in piecemeal. As aforementioned, I realized that she had more of my things and unfortunately, I had to meet with her to collect them. Having her mail them would only buy her time, and naturally, some crisis with the postal service would occur, preventing her to return items that never belonged to her. You hear that crazy subletter  - items that never belonged to you. Why is this concept so difficult for you to grasp?

After her canceling on me several times and changing the time at the last minute, my mother and I were finally able to get to honor her commitment and met her on a gloomy autumn afternoon in Albertson. We pulled into Da Vinci's parking lot and there she was, waiting in her car to hand over the hot items. This is the first time I had seen her since the summer. The last time we saw each other was in Paris where we were having dinner with Monsieur Flâneur at Le Chinon in the Marais where I was completely oblivious to the fact that I was breaking bread with two morally inept sociopaths, or as my mother simply calls them; total a-holes.

Approaching her in the parking lot, I tapped on her car window and she rolled her eyes at the sight of me as if it was me who was inconveniencing her. N'importe quoi. She got out of the car and handed over a garbage bag that contained my grandmother's black long cashmere sweater, a chunky Anthropologie cardigan that I bought back when I worked there in high school and the only designer item I own that was paid retail; a navy blue J'Adore Dior t-shirt that my mom bought me for my 20th birthday at Harrod's on her first layover in London. 

My mother, of course, couldn't resist adding her two cents, repeating my questions and backing me up as if I was Diana Ross and she was one of The Supremes. "What were you thinking?" I'd ask which would then be followed by, "Yeah, what were you thinking?", "Do you have a soul?", "Yeah, do you have a soul?", "Is there anything else?", "Yeah exactly, is there anything else?". Thanks, Mom. The subletter couldn't give a straight answer, only excuses and frankly, she couldn't care less. She was bored with us. While my mother wanted answers, I just wanted to leave. My strong distaste for her is obvious and no longer have the energy to make snarky comments, I just want her to be gone.

The sublet claims that she will pay me back for the apartment damages and made sure to make her best puppy dog face feigning concern and regret over her bad decision of robbing me - it was all so embarrassing. She's not upset that she completed the third installment of the trifecta of my 2011 hell, it's obvious that she's upset because she got caught and exposed. Next time, crazy subletter, don't mess with a crazy Italian chick who has had a bad year.

It'll be a while before I wear these returned items because they smell like low-class trash and taking everything to get dry-cleaned at once would cost a fortune. Is this story coming to an end? I have no idea, I hope so. It seems to be the story that keeps on unraveling. Have I learned my lesson? Certainly. With this whole mess, it's no wonder that I'm having problems opening up to my current boyfriend. After everything that has happened this year, who can you trust? 

I'm just waiting for the latest discovery. She's already stolen my pants, perfume, and panties, what could possibly go missing next?


  1. I feel ya, rough week still working through the never-ending after-effects of the sociopath in my life (and I really think that's the appropriate term)! Crossing my fingers for you...

  2. I'm glad you put up her name again. She still has your things so she should not be let off the hook. Also, it is important to help keep others from being stolen from.

    I will never lease my apartment with valuables in it. I've lent friends items but that's as far as I will go. You were too trusting, but it's a life lesson and you will benefit from this terrible experience in your future. I've been too trusting as well, assuming other people were more-or-less like me (honest and respectful). You are also helping to prevent others to be stolen from. Good for you! I have friends and family in LI, perhaps I should get the word out there.

  3. @Gwan - I've been reading your story too. Geez! What's wrong with people?!

    @Dana - I was too trusting. I assumed that she wasn't going to go searching for my stuff, since I was only gone for a month. And days before she came, Seb was in London and MF was SOOO UNHELPFUL and it was pouring rain, so I had no help storing my things at Phil's house. And her name is back because the deal was if she gave me everything back and paid me back for some things, I'd remove her name, but she played me again and held stuff back hoping I wouldn't notice.

  4. I didn't know that it was only for a MONTH. You just got the wrong girl. I don't believe in 'bad luck', it's just a one in a thousand kinda' thing. Chance. Sometimes we're in the wrong place at the wrong time. I hope you've gotten most of your stuff back. Ugh.

  5. Ay yi yi! I hope this ordeal ends very soon for you. This Katie sounds wretched and like grenobloise said, I too am glad that you are putting her whole name up here, her karma will get to her.

  6. @Dana - Yes, it was only a month. That's why I left some things hidden away. If only I knew...

    @Lauren - It's the gift that keeps on giving. I will never sublet again. I now have to pay for the damages she made! : /

  7. Grenobloise is right, it's a hard and sucky lesson learning that no, others don't do unto you as you would to them. (Sometimes. I'm trying to keep optimistic for most of the human race.)

  8. The mom comment cracked me up pretty good:)

  9. What happened to the Dior bag?